Lovin' Life 24-7

Just Believe

2007-02-13T20:39:00.000-08:00

Last night, I had a chance to share my story about God in my life with my small group bible study members. I was surprised that they thought my story was very cool and personal. I thought my stroy would be boring, so I talked real fast. Anyhow, I was glad that my story could touch some of my friends' hearts.

One part of my story was about how I claimed my faith recently. Think about you're in a relationship with a guy. I sort of liked him without knowing what he was all about. I thought it was pretty coold to have someone i could talk all the time. And then, I got busy with other things - friends, school, etc - and he seemed less cool. He didn't seem to talk to me very much and I wasn't able to feel his presence all the time. Therefore, I ignored him for a long time or didn't trust him for some reason. I tried to test him and see if he still loved me. I was mean to him. I vented on him whenever I got frustrated with my life. He stayed by my side although I used him as my punching ball sometimes. Some other times, I was good to him and appreciated his presence and love. However, he was often overlooked whenever I got really busy. I have had this kind of relationship with God for 28 years now.

If you're in a relationship with someone and he has been good to you no matter what you do to him, wouldn't you believe that he really loves you? Recently, I just decide to believe God loves me so much. I just decide to believe in Him. I just decide to love him. Actually, claiming my faith wasn't as hard as I thought. It was that simple!

Jamestown, AL

2007-01-31T10:13:00.000-08:00

Late Posting - Jamestown, AL Nov 2006.

Thanks to Lance, I was able to climb at Jamestown, AL. It was very different to climb 90 feet walls when I was used to climb at the gym, which had 27 feet walls.

Now I realize that it's hard to see a rope in this picture. I didn't lead but it looks like I was soloing, which I won't do it Ever!

Gee... I started using climbing jargons.

Rock Climbing Effects

2007-01-26T12:10:00.000-08:00

It's been almost a year since I started rock climbing. This is one of very few sports that I stick to more than a couple of months and I wondered why I like this so much.

1. Social effects
Climbing is not a team sport for sure, but you need to have a belayer unless you're up for bouldering. It's a good way to walk to a stranger and ask for a ride - to the ceiling. When you go outside, it's really hard not to meet people and became friends. I heard that there are some gyms where people are not very friendly but the gym I go to is pretty nice in that perspective.
Also, it's a good place to hang out and catch up in between climbing. I thnk I spend a lot of time with Joyce and Richard (picture) at the gym more than any other places these days.

2. Physical effects
Although people do not get scared of the size my forearm muscles, I definitely have built some strengths. These days, i can boulder around the gym without taking too much break. ;) I still cannot do any pull-ups but i'll get there eventually. I gained 10 lbs since I started climbing about a year ago. However, my dress size hasn't changed unless all my clothes were stretched. I guess, I didn't have any muscles before??? Polishing my nails used to be one of my ways to release stress. I was told that I have pretty hands until I started climbing. Rock climbing indeed screwed my nails but I don't care that much anymore. Why? Richard convinced me and Joyce that guys don't care much about Women's nail much. I guess, i trade my pretty nails with toned back??

3. Psychological effects
I like climbing because you can see your progress and set your goals for the next time. If you haven't noticed, I'm pretty much goal-oriented and goal-driven person. Therefore, having a tangible goals and work towards those is pretty fun.
Overhanging walls are still very intimidating but those are there to challenge me. From my experience, psychological part is very big in climbing, depending on your confidence level, you can or cannot climb certain routes. It's tricky not to get your mind affect you, though.
It's so surprising when you tell your self "you can do it" and then reach for the next hold, chances are very high that you can reach it. This practice helped me in other parts of my life as well.

Overall this sport made me a better and stronger person both inside and out. So, guys, let's climb on!

Wow! Already 2007

2007-01-10T14:54:00.000-08:00

It's embarassing that the last entry of this site was October!
I guess, my life got a bit hectic as the new project started and my responsibilities became tenfolds. I went to Korea to change my VISA status and then holiday seasons...

So, I didn't even think about the New Year's resolutions yet until my co-worker asked the team to write down one for a newspaper.

Here's one of my new year's resolutions. I work at CDC right now where public health is emphasized. That's why there is a nice gym in the building for free to employees and even contractors. I've gone there twice for the last three months. So, for this year, I'll increase the frequency of hitting the gym to twice for three weeks. :) How about that?
And seriously, before my annual rock gym membership expires, i will hit the gym twice a week. I want to climb 5.9 real well so that I can start the lead climb. yay~!

What's your new year's resolution!

BTW, here's the resolution from 2006 now i'm thinking it was not possible. - give up junk food and eat healthy! Well... I ended up wearing my favorite "I love Carbs" t-shirt and had McDonalds for lunch yesterday. I want to give up junk food eventually, though.

Negotiation skills: job offer

2006-10-19T19:48:00.000-07:00

I attended a negotiation skills workshop today and during the lecture, i realized how naive i was when i acceped the job offer.
"Negotiation" was the last thing that I had in my mind. Why? Because I was desperate to get A job. I did not know what "Base Salary" meant. I thought that was the walk away minimum level, not the salary before bonus and benefits. I didn't even research how much the average salary is for the position. Stupid!!!
I knew that I got the lower position because the director didn't see my academic experience as my real experience.
I researched a bit and realized that what I'm making is the far bottom (actually out of the average range when they applied my personal qualification/education level).

I know i should be very grateful to get the current job so that I can make a living and have a good life in a new city. But, it's important to market yourself at a proper value. Gosh~! I need to get about 40% raise to meet the median level of salary. 40% raise, huh?

I know money is not everything but when i found out all this today, I wasn't a very happy person. :( Ahhhh~~ I better prepare for the next negotiation session.

Dissertation

2006-10-15T20:29:00.000-07:00

I thought it was funny to present my dissertation at AECT exactly a year after my dissertation defense.
I'm so glad it was over! I have no desire to go back to school and work on my dissertation if I had taken a job without finishing it. :)

AECT Debrief

2006-10-15T08:43:00.000-07:00

It was my 5th year at the AECT (Association for Educational Communication and Technology) conference. It was my first one after the graduation and I noticed some changes this time.

1. Funding: Since I'm not in academia, my situation was different from many of other attendees. In business consulting, not many people appreciate the value of presenting an academic paper at a major conference. Therefore, I had to support myself to go to this conference. I had to use my personal time and expenses, which ended up quite expensive. When I was a grad student, I was able to receive funding from different sources and didn’t have to pay much. Some co-workers did not understand me why I spend so much money and time to go to the conference. Ah well…

2. Job: I was glad to see many of my friends found good jobs in academia. I was a bit envious a bit when a friend of mine had a position at Indiana University. However, I asked myself if I would like to move to Indiana for a job. I’m not very good with cold weather and my answer would be “I wouldn’t be as excited as when I got a job offer from my current position.” Anyhow, many people found it odd that I, who is in business consulting, attended conference.

3. Good ol’ time: Like I mentioned earlier, it’s my 5th year since I started attending conferences. I learned how to enjoy conferences. The real fun starts outside of sessions. I attended only two sessions in this conference. For me, the main reason to attend this conference was to strengthen my existing network. It was nice to meet old faces from PIDT, AECT, and ISPI. I went out for lunch/dinner two nights in a row with many people. I had a good time. ;) Too bad I missed the Korean event on Thursday night, though. I hope I don’t miss much.

4. Bottom line: I wanted to go back to academia after getting some experience from the consulting. But do I really want to? Or do I have pressure to go back to academia because that seems the right thing to do if you have Ph.D? My interest is mostly in higher education and work settings. My ultimate interest is to provide strategies to grow and improve their performance through analysis, evaluation, and other systems approach. I decide not to worry too much about my future career path. About a year and a half ago when I attended PIDT, I told everyone that I would love to be in consulting to get some experience. At that time, it looked really tough to get a job in consulting but it happened. If I really focus on what I want, I’m sure opportunities will come alone. I rather focus on what I really want in my life in terms of my career. J

Restless

2006-09-21T14:57:00.000-07:00

Rest! How do you rest physically or mentally or both? For upcoming Bridge single ministry event, I’ll prepare for the discussion material for “Rest.”
I really don’t know how to rest. Even when I sleep, my mind is so busy that in my dream I’m busy with preparing for a final report, an important project or running around. I often fail to distinguish whether I was dreaming or not, so what happens in my dream seems real and the stress level is the same as it would happen in my real life. Therefore, I can’t really get sound rest when I busy dreaming while I sleep.

I didn’t realize that I’ve been very tense until I visited my aunt and uncle in Florida in the beginning of this month. I was so sleep for the entire weekend and I went to bed before 10 pm and slept through 8 in the morning. In addition, I had to take a nap every day. When I go back home in Atlanta, I couldn’t really rest since I always plan so many things over the weekend and have to start my day from 7 or 8 on Saturday morning. I’m busy working during the week like everyone else, and then busy with other activities over the weekend - hiking, biking, climbing, bible studies, socials, hanging out with friends, etc. Even when I watch a movie at home, I play with my laptop at the same time or sort mails. I just can’t be still. However, my problem is, though, I don’t feel like I achieve many things. For example, I'm stressed out because I feel I'm behind of doing research and publsihing articles but is really hard for me to find time or energy to work on those things. I always feel like I'm behind of something. Is it because of I’m an over achiever or I’m not efficient enough to do all tasks on time?

I like to analyze things, which is perfect for my job. However, sometimes I wish I can just stop thinking and analyzing in so many different angles. When I’m physically so tired at night, my head is still spinning with all thoughts. I wish I learn how to let go my thoughts and fall a sleep. I never had problems falling a sleep when I was in Korea. As I started living alone in the States, I started having problems falling a sleep less than 20 minutes. Sometimes it takes me an hour till I fall a sleep. I wonder I cannot fall a sleep easily because I have full of worries and concerns. I can’t help wondering if my faith is not strong enough and I end up worrying about little things. I want to be relaxed and take some sound rest in God’s hands.

What? Was Jesus a bad boy?

2006-09-19T13:13:00.000-07:00

The article from a good friend of mine made me think about many different things, especially about dating. Anyhow, I totally agreed that passion with no foundation crumble at the end.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A Bad Boy and a Good GuyBeing

a man with both passion and purpose.by Jason IllianApril 12, 2006

James Bond. John Wayne. James Dean. Indiana Jones. These men always got the girl at the end of the movie. Not only did they fight the good fight, they did so on their own terms and didn't care what anyone else thought. Men wanted to be like them and women wanted to be with them.
Have you ever noticed that women often go for this "bad boy" image? Why is this? Shouldn't a woman after God's own heart desire a man who's thoughtful, courteous, polite, and nice?
Despite what you may think, part of being a man after God's own heart is being a bad boy. And wanting a bad boy isn't some genetic flaw like power shopping. God designed it this way. He knowingly instilled the desire in women to have an impact, to be part of an adventure. Women like bad boys because they're dangerous and bold. They don't set out to be nice. They break rules, ignore traditions, stir up chaos, and live life on the edge. They're rebels who are tough, unbound, and free. They're not just going through the motions—they're fully alive. In many ways they're like … Jesus.
And if you think about it, Jesus was both a good guy and a bad boy.
Of course, the power of Christ's life was that he didn't set out to be a good guy or a bad boy. He wasn't so concerned with what he was doing, but the reason why he was doing it. He remained completely true to the call on his life—to glorify God and to sacrifice his life for our sins—and at times circumstances arose where remaining true to his passion made him the bad boy.
I wish I could say the same about many Christian men. Unfortunately, many of us have made our walk with Christ about as adventurous as gardening. I'm not suggesting we have to drop-kick the neighbor's poodle or rob the local 7-11 to get our mojo back. But we do have to be willing to be bad.
Many of us have a warped view of who Jesus really was and how his message was accepted at his time. He was the soft-hearted savior who wept at the news of Lazarus' death (John 11:35) and the tender judge who forgave the adulterous woman (John 8:11), but as Paul Harvey often states, there is more to "the rest of the story." Jesus was a rebel. In the name of God, he made a whip of cords, overturned tables, and chased businessmen out of the temple (John 2:15). He broke Old Testament law (Exodus 20:8, Deuteronomy 5:12) and infuriated the religious elite by working and healing on the Sabbath (Luke 6:1-11). He questioned authority and refused to respond when it wasn't in line with his purpose (Mark 11:27-33). I doubt when people met in the market that anyone referred to him as a "nice" or "good" guy.
But, for lack of a better term, he was a good guy too. He was good not because he conformed to predetermined religious standards, but because he conformed to the will of God and was obedient to the calling on his life. Most of us think we struggle with faith, but what we really struggle with is obedience. Christ set an example by being "good and faithful" to his heavenly call while being "dangerous and unpredictable" to the world in which he lived. He was the perfect blend of both purpose and passion.
The key to balancing the "good guy" and "bad boy" characteristics is radical obedience to God's call on your life. Circumstances will change, but when Christ is your compass there will be times when you're considered a good guy and times when you're considered a bad boy. Men who are intriguing and attractive make decisions that are obedient to Christ's call on their lives, regardless of the repercussions. They do what's right even if no one else is doing it. And they stand proudly on their decisions. They don't assume to know all the answers, but they're willing to step out in faith and be decisive.
If you're a woman and you desire a man whose soul is rugged and whose life has flair, please understand this isn't a sin. Your spiritual DNA is intricately woven in such a way that you yearn to complement a man who wants to make a heavenly impact. But even though your desire may be in the right place, your application can be faulty. If you scan the ranks of your single Christian friends, I'm sure you'll find at least one girl who's misunderstood the tug on her heart. For example, I have a friend named Christine who has a habit of dating adventurous men, but not adventurous godly men. She dates musicians who don't go to church. She dates outdoor enthusiasts who don't read the Bible. She dates world travelers who believe "all roads lead to heaven." In essence, she dates men who have passion but no purpose. So time and time again, she gets her heart crushed. If a passion doesn't have a foundation, it will eventually crumble.
I've spoken to thousands of women over the last year and the common denominator in nearly every conversation is that they want a man who's a leader and who exemplifies authority. Men should certainly be sensitive and considerate of their girlfriends, but not so much so that they ignore the pursuits and passions God's placed on their hearts. When we're overly sensitive, we aren't godly; we're wimpy. As men, we often fail to realize that what makes us attractive is our faithfulness to our passions, even when it's unpopular.
There's a fallacy in the Christian world that a "mature, godly, romantic" love is one that's void of feelings and passions. Somewhere along the way—probably between thinking Britney Spears could sing and Paris Hilton could act—we began to believe that unconditional love is without a spark. We couldn't be more wrong. It's this passion, this spark, that ignites a relationship and keeps it burning for life. Love isn't about feelings, but it's about convictions and passions. And when men forfeit their convictions to be nice, polite, good guys, they stop being the boyfriends and husbands God designed them to be. We need to load our iPods with a little old school Michael Jackson and be reminded of the desire to be "Bad." For God's sake, we need to do it. For women's sake, too.
It may appear that being a "good guy" and a "bad boy" are contradictory traits, but it's just the balance that men need to be warriors and comforters, leaders and servants, husbands and sons. Women often fall for the "bad boy" not because their hearts are misguided, but because they're being obedient to the call in their lives. Now it's time for men to do the same. It's time for men to have both passion and purpose. So, I guess there's just one last question to ask…
Bad boys, bad boys, whatcha goin' do, whatcha goin' do?….

Dragon Boat

2006-09-10T08:22:00.000-07:00

Thanks to my good Malaysian friends, Boh-Ying, i was able to experience the Dragon Boat festival yesterday. The Malaysian team won the 4th place out of the 16 recreational teams.
The first 3 teams were very strong teams (1st place -Semens team with all big males, 2nd place - U.S. marine corp team, 3rd place - U.S. dragon boat team) and i was proud that our team won the 4th place.

One of the Malaysian association members is a great photographer and here's the website you can peek what happened at the festival. Enjoy~!

http://www.770i.com/photos/dragonboat/

Rental car and Ownership

2006-08-31T13:58:00.000-07:00

As I started traveling to NJ, I rent a car every week. When I see many people who drive rental cars (including myself), I can see the tendency of becoming more reckless drivers. People step on gas too much too quickly and don’t really care if the RPM goes above 4. If there are speed humps, people don’t reduce speed enough with the rental cars, either. When I got a ride with my manager’s own car, however, he drove quite differently (he’s still a reckless driver.) That’s why I am not surprised when I rented a car that’s slightly over 25000 miles on it feels like a 5-6 years old car because of careless drivers.

Why people drive rental cars differently from their own cars? I believe that’s related to their ownership of the car. When you own your car, you have to deal with the consequences of your driving habits/styles. Rental cars, however, are different stories. You rent it for certain amount of time and then, it’s not yours anymore and you don’t have to worry about it.

Ownership is also related to commitment. “Something belongs to me” means I need to take care of it while I decide to have it. In that sense, it’s important to have a nice owner. Who’s the owner of your life? I’m glad my God is the owner of my life who loves me so much.

Nerd, Geek, Dork

2006-08-29T19:20:00.000-07:00

You can call me one of them as long as you put "cool" or "hot" in front of it. :)
I admit that I'm a nerd/geek/dork. The followings are only a couple of indications that I'm one of those.

1. It has been a while since I was working on a conference proposal or a journal article. I just couldn't even look at one more article after finishing my dissertation. I thought about writing a journal article with my dissertation. However, I just didn't have any energy to open my dissertation file (Yes.. we're living in a digital era and i don't even have a bounded copy of my dissertation).

I'm so glad to have a friend who encouraged me to work on writing journal articles. Otherwise, I would think about it but wouldn't write anything. I finally looked at a couple of different submission guidelines and started working on writing a short article. I, surprisingly, like this.
Yes... I'm sitting in my hotel room after working 10 hours at the office today. I like to read more about "Problem-Based Learning" and how it was used in different settings. I can't wait to read more tomorrow.

About a month ago, I felt the needs to study about financial statement and basic finance/accounting terms. Fortunately, my co-worker/former classmate/friend wanted to brush up his accounting/finance knowledge and volunteered to lead a small study group. So, three of us started a "Little Seminoles Book Club." We just finished our 3rd discussion today and look forward to starting case studies from next week. I was so excited to learn the difference between balance sheet, income statement, and cash flow statement and what information it entails. We're thinking about continuing this book club and considering studying statistics for the next topic. I guess, i'm going to lead the discussion. :D

In general, I like to learn (except languages) and enjoys (for the most part) intellectual stimulations. I had been over stimulated in the academic setting for a LONG time and now i miss it. I'm glad I started working on my research again. Yay!

Tennis and relationship

2006-08-28T17:49:00.000-07:00

U.S. open started today and during the conversation with my friend, i was thinking about the analogy between tennis and relationship.

No matter how good you are in tennis, you cannot win the match when you play double and your partner and you're not a good fit. To make it worse, if both players play by different rules, you really cannot win the match. It's not about who's a better or worse player. Two good playes cannot guarantee to win, either. When you play double, you need to compliment each other's strengthes and weaknesses. You have to be on the same page in terms of enthusiasm, passion, and purpose behind the game. If one person wants to play tennis for fun vs. the other player wants to win the U.S. open, it might be hard to get along. I can easily see one player has to drag another one to the court to practice. It gets old...

It might better to play single until you find a right partner to play double. At the end, it's all about enjoy the game or your life.. it doesn't matter whether you play single or double.
Until I find the right player, I will enjoy playing single and moving forward to my next dream.
Don't forget that people watch more single's game than double in U.S. Open. At least I do. :)

Grateful

2006-08-23T18:20:00.000-07:00

For the last couple of weeks, I felt extra grateful about my life in general.

August 6th in 2001 was the day I came to the U.S. to study at Florida State University. It's been 5 years since I started living alone in this country. While I was celebrating my 5th year anniversary (and going through some difficult time around that period) in the U.S., I appreciated my friends around me. Let's think about it for secound.
These friends are from diverse backgrounds and i wouldn't be able to meet these cool people if I stayed in Korea.
Once again I realized that i have great support system.

Whenever I need advice in my life, I still ask for my parents' opinions. I just can't ask more for better parents than them.
When I need spiritual support, I have Jay and Joyce
When I need emotional support, i have Paul.
When I want different opinions from Paul, I have Eric.
When I want straightforward opinions, i have Joyce, Ferdinand, and Beatrix,
When I want to talk about guys and go out for dancing, I have Becky
When I want to go shopping, I have Kate
When I need academic support and advice, I get it from Ben and Clint
When I want to talk about drinks, I have Ben and Ferdinand
When I want to go out in NJ, I have fellowship group girls from the Praise church
I also have sister-like friends, Jeehyae, Youngjoo, Joohyun, Soyoung, and of course my cousins, Lois, Angie, and Jenny
I have my American mom, my aunt
My american grandmother, Ms. Isaacs
My friends from back in Korea - Soojin, Kumok, and Hyekyung.
I have friends who miss me from Singapore, Jason and Bryan. ;)
Even my project manager who I had tough time to get along in the beginning became one of my closest friends at work.

I wonder what kind of friend I am to them. I hope I can be a good supporter to their lives as well.

I thank God for bringing us together. :)

Love Profile

2006-08-05T13:09:00.000-07:00

Your Five Variable Love Profile

Propensity for Monogamy:
Your propensity for monogamy is medium.In general, you prefer to have only one love interest.But it's hard for you to stay devoted for too long!There's too much eye candy to keep you from wandering.
Experience Level:
Your experience level is high.You've loved, lost, and loved again.You have had a wide range of love experiences.And when the real thing comes along, you know it!
Dominance:
Your dominance is medium.You tend to be the one with more power.You aren't a total control freak in relationships..But of course you don't mind getting you way!
Cynicism:
Your cynicism is medium.You'd like to believe in true and everlasting love...But you've definitely been burned enough to know better.You're still an optimist, but you also are a realist.
Independence:
Your independence is high.You don't need to be in love, and sometimes you don't even want love.Having your own life is very important for you...Even more important than having a relationship.

The Five Variable Love Test

Currently Listening - In between dreams

2006-05-17T08:18:00.000-07:00

Better Together
by Jack Johnson

There's no combination of words
I could put on the back of a postcard
No song I could singBut I can try for your heart
Our dreams, and they are made out of real things
Like a, shoebox of photographs
With sepiatone loving
Love is the answer,At least for most of the questions in my heart
Like why are we here? and where do we go?And how come it's so hard?
It's not always easy and Sometimes life can be deceiving
I'll tell you one thing its always better when we're together

[Chorus:]MMM its always better when we're together
Yeah, look at the stars when we're together
Well, it's always better when we're together
Yeah, it's always better when we're together

And all of these moments
Just might find their way into my dreams tonight
But I know that theyll be gone
When the morning light sings
And brings new things
For tomorrow night you see
That theyll be gone too
Too many things I have to do
But if all of these dreams might find their way into my day to day scene
I'd be under the impression I was somewhere in between
With only two Just me and you
Not so many things we got to do
Or places we got to be
We'll Sit beneath the mango tree now

Its always better when we're together
Mmmm, we're somewhere in between together
Well, it's always better when we're together
Yeah, it's always better when we're together
MMmmmm MMMmmmm Mmmmmm

I believe in memoriesThey look so, so pretty when I sleep
Hey now, and when I wake up,You look so pretty sleeping next to me
But there is not enough time,And there is no song I could sing
And there is no, combination of words I could say
But I will still tell you one thing We're Better together.

--------------------------------------
I like to listen to happy songs. He must write this song when he's in love.
I miss that feeling. Love is a strange thing that you cannot control.
Although I want to fall in love, it doesn't happen as I wanted and vice versa.
Ah well... I believe Love will come unexpectedly. ;)

Ms. Brightside

2006-05-16T16:27:00.000-07:00

I don't know what happened to me recently but I noticed that I've focused on more darker sides than brighter sides these days. It's important to be cautious but I want to go back to Ms. Brightside.
Let's smile, Sookyung. :)

Story of my life - Sports

2006-05-16T12:19:00.000-07:00

When I was in school in Korea, most of the gym class had to do with team sports, which of course had to do with flying balls. Yeah... I managed to hit by those while I played and that's why I never really liked playing sports. As a result, for a longest time, I thought I was not good at any sports at all. Gym class was not my favorite class when I was little. Therefore, I never thought I would be good at any sports. What I found out was I was just a bit challenged in hand-eye coordination.

As long as there is a sport that doesn't involve in flying balls toward to my face, I can handle it alright. For example, golf, pool, or bowling. I'm not good at those but I'm not too shabby compared to other sports such as volley ball, basket ball, or soccer.

For some reason, I hated running and never even tried to run. I enjoyed other cardio exercises such as biking and swimming, though. Anyhow, I went for running last Saturday at Chattahoochee river park. First of all, it was quite different feel to run outside where it's so pretty and breezy.
Second, running next to someone helped me tremendously to keep myself going. At the end, I don't want to quit when someone is still running next to me (call me stubborn!). Surprisingly, I was able to run 2 miles - a short break after 1 mile. I was never ever able to run that long without walking or taking a break. How nice to have a feeling of achievement!! Well… after running 2 miles, I discovered all kinds of muscles that I hardly used (it was painful to walk for 2 days).

I learned playing sports stimulates my mental challenges more than physical ones. Believe it or not, I like mental challenges. After finding that out, it looks like I will enjoy doing sports more than ever. :)

Confidence Bipolar

2006-05-11T12:38:00.000-07:00

When it comes to my confidence level, I’m a bipolar.
Most of the times, I have been an over achiever and I tend to be harsh on myself. As a result, my confidence level often suffers from my high expectation levels.

As I enter in the 4th month of Real World consulting business, my confidence level hit the bottom. Why? It’s the combination of feeling lost in my career path and trying to mixed expectations in this company.

I feel like I started all over again after all that hard work (honestly, I’ve been lucky and it wasn’t that tough but still…) and getting Ph.D. was a waste of time. Once again, it’s time to tell myself “Everything is going to be alright. Be patient and take one step at a time.” Easier said than done, though.

I just need some nice back rubs, ice cream, hot baths, and someone (some people) who listens to me and gives me encouragements.

How Nerdy Are You?

2006-05-10T14:12:00.000-07:00

By clicking this link, you might get some points already.

It turned out that I'm only "Somewhat Nerdy." I better stick to the cool dork. :)

Try it!

http://www.nerdtests.com/ft_nq.php?im

Climbing Competition

2006-05-02T11:48:00.000-07:00

My first rock climbing competition was April 22nd 2006. It had been 3 months since I started climbing so I didn't expect to be in the final. Also, I couldn't climb very well that morning and got frustrated. Surprisingly, my name was called for one of finalists!!

Guess what? I won the 1st place in Beginner's division. Rock on!

This is what happens

2006-04-17T13:09:00.000-07:00

when two nerds hang out - teaching each other basics of engineering and human performance improvement. :)

My Dissertation

2006-04-13T13:22:00.000-07:00

I just found out my dissertation is availiable on FSU E-Library. Isn't it sad that my dissertation cannot be in the library and collect some dust? But, to save trees and to make process much simpler, all I had to do to publish my dissertation was to upload the PDF file.

For those who don't believe that I have Ph.D., here's the evidence. ;)

http://etd.lib.fsu.edu/theses/available/etd-11102005-120503/unrestricted/Suh_S_Dissertation.pdf

Enjoy reading, especially when you have troubles falling a sleep. It's only 140 something pages.

Conference Follow-up

2006-04-13T13:08:00.000-07:00

After reading this entry, you can call me a dork since I deserve it. :) I love to attend conferences and be engaged in thought provoking conversation/discussion.

Over the weekend, I attended the International Society for Performance Improvement conference in Dallas, TX. It's one of my favorite conferences since I can learn what I'm interested in and talk about my interest with people who really care about that matter for Hours.

It's been already 3 years since I first attended this conference and was surprised to see I met many presenters already and knew how this conference works. Those are the things you learn unconsciously.

After the intense three day stay at the conference, I feel intellectually charged. Also, I had a chance to think about my career and what i want to do in a long run. The problem is I want to be in Academia and Consulting at the same time and it's not easy. However, there are quite a few people, and they are the proud FSU IS alumni, who do the both successfully. It was inspiring to meet them and learn about what they are doing and how they did it.

To me, conference became an annual reunion with colleagues, friends, and alumni. Once again, I learned that FSU is still a big name at the ISPI; I met so many FSU graduates who are now in Coast Guards, HRD centers in Korea, and professors in universities. I even met a friend from college in Korea at the conference. We haven't seen each other over 5 years and she came to my session. What a surprise!

Ahhh... After attending the conference, I had to deal with the feeling of "Publish or Perish," which I tried to avoid for the last several months. Yes, I was a bit burnt when I finished my dissertation but it's time to go back and write an article. *sigh* Well~ I can do it! I just have to find my time between working full time, rock climbing, and attending my friends' events. :)

Back to Basics

2006-04-07T04:23:00.000-07:00

I'm an over achiever and like to move forward. That's why I tend to learn fast and make a big progress in the beginning of learning something new.
It was somewhat the same with the rock climbing. It has been two months and a half since I started and I was able to climb a couple of intermediate routes very quickly.

However, as I tried on harder routes, I felt I needed more skills and techniques. Sometimes I stuck in the middle and could not climb gracefully in some routes.

Recently I started to climb with one of my co-worker, who' s very experienced in climbing - It's fun to have someone to talk about climbing at work. He recommended me to stay on beginner's easy routes and work on building techniques instead of pushing myself to a harder route.

I already started seeing some results of going "Back to Basics." I had more energy to climb when I stayed in easier routes and working on my balance, foot works, and endurance.

When I went to the rock gym after a long day at work last night, I really wanted to go home and take some rest. I yarned the whole way to the gym. Guess what? Once I warmed up properly, I became an Energizer Bunny. I climbed for 2 and a half hours and I had to give up not because my arms were tired, but because of my toes, which means I started using more toes and legs (good sign).

Sometimes I forget to go back to basics when I am very focused on moving forwards. However, sometimes you need to step back a little bit to be even stronger and better. It’ll be the same thing with my job. Instead of focusing on promotions, I’d like to be good at whatever I was assigned in the project and leverage my knowledge and skills properly.

Lonely girl became a Party Girl?

2006-04-01T12:03:00.000-08:00

As my social caldender is getting full, people started seeing me as a party girl.
After a hard core party last Wednesday, I cannot help but agreeing my friends' opinion. Some of my co-workers really like to go out and we ended up having a party till 3 in the morning on WEDNESDAY!!

Last Saturday, I was invited to go to a hot night club in Atlanta. Since she was a friend of VIPs of the culb, Vision, I didn't have to pay the expensive cover (20 bucks!!).
I think i went out for dinner or drinks almost every day for 2 weeks in a row and i cannot keep up anymore.

When I look back my life in January, it's been a big change. I wanted to have friends and go out everyday. Since I was very very lonely until mid February, I prayed about that matter quite a bit. God knows I'm so impatient and sent me Joyce immediately. Yeah~ My personal party organizer. ;)

The bottom line is I'm grateful and happy with my new life in Atlanta.

First Climbing Trip

2006-03-30T11:55:00.000-08:00

It's a late posting, I know. I went to my first outdoor climbing trip on March 18th in Tennessee. It was my first time in Tennessee as well although I used to live near by W. Tennessee St. for 4 years in Tallahassee, FL.

It was a lot of fun to walk around narrow trail or create our own trail. We got lost for a while and passed all the bouldering areas. Good thing that we met some climbers before too late. I didn't get to climb very much at all and no regrets on that because I wasn't feeling comfortable climbing those rocks anyway. It definitely felt different from climbing in a gym for sure.

Look at my battle scar. I haven't had any cuts for a long time except paper cut once in a while. Therefore, it felt pretty bad although it looks like a little scratch. I guess I better get used to have scrapes on arms and legs if I'm going to climb outside.
Those rocks are really rough and hard. Who knew that? LOL.

When you think about the idea of climbing, it's pretty funny. I didn't pay attention whatever rocks I saw when I used to hike. Now, I'm surrounded with people who would say "Wow! That crack looks awesome to climb. Yeah! That angle must be tricky to do sit-start."
And, it's also amazing how people explore new areas and climb on different route and rate difficulties and stuff.

Although it was a bit chilly, it was gorgeous day.
I realized that I had potential to be an outdoor person from this trip.

Outdoor girl?

2006-03-27T13:14:00.000-08:00

At the end, I wasn’t a very girly girl. Especially these days, I have been going outside more often for hiking, walking trails, climbing, and mountain biking. I went to my first rock climbing trip 10 days ago at Pot Point bouldering area in Tennessee. I also went to climb on last Sat for a very short time in Boat Rock, GA. For that short period of time, I managed to get a cut on my finger and some scrapes on my arms and legs. Yeah! The rocks are really rough.

I tried mountain biking for the first time last Sunday. I’ve enjoyed riding a bike and I considered myself as a good bike rider. However, riding a bike on a narrow mountain trail with a lot of rocks and tree roots was a totally different story. And what kind of person would bring a first time mountain biker to a trail like that? I guess it looked flat to him. I was glad I tried something new but I didn’t have very good experience. It would have been different if I tried in Florida trail.

Anyway, I’m glad I have chances to try new things. I noticed I like sports that I can be in control, though – I couldn’t control that well on mountain biking, so I don’t think I will enjoy. Ah well. What’s new? LOL.

Great Sleeper

2006-03-22T14:46:00.000-08:00

If you hang out with me long enough, you might notice that I’m a great sleeper. Yes, I’m always sleepy and need to sleep about 8 hours everyday to function. I’m not a morning person and I don’t talk much – can you believe this? - before noon. I was the only one who would fall a sleep during the class in the middle school. Besides, I have short attention span. Therefore, if I work on a same document for more than 30 min, I get so sleepy. Even when I was working on my doctorate, I was not able to work on the same section of the dissertation for so long. I would watch a movie/TV or sleep after working on my dissertation for a couple of hours.

Now, it’s a different story. Thanks to my manager, I was able to go to work late and stay late, which doesn’t bother me. However, sitting in front of the desk for 8 hours a day is the hard thing to be adjusted. But do I have any option? No. I have to do what I have to do. As a result, I started drinking caffeinated drinks more than ever before. I can’t believe I started drinking Coke!

Mom

2006-03-22T10:12:00.000-08:00

Mom's birthday is coming and I found a card exactly says what I want to say to her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mother,
When it comes to knowing

how to give and how to love,
You’ve always been a true inspiration.
Your love and faith have been
At the heart of our family
Your unselfish acts have been a reflection
Of your kindness and caring.
The strength you give has been the bond that keeps us close

The little things you do
With all the love in your heart
Have made such a difference.

No matter what,
Your love is always there,
And on your birthday and always
May you know how much I love you.

2006-03-21T19:48:00.000-08:00

From the workshop at D.C.

Ultimate Eyecandy

2006-03-21T19:30:00.000-08:00

Let’s be honest. Isn’t he gorgeous? I haven’t had a thing for blonde guy with blue eyes – maybe a little now because of Paul Walker. I know he’s trying to be a serious actor and did not want to take his shirt of as much as he used to. But even in this Disney movie, Eight Below, he had to take off his shirt for many girls, women, and some guys – Come on, he’s in North Pole in that movie but somehow they made him to show his bare chest. And I didn’t care about the plot of “Into the Blue” because I was busy looking at him (my guy friend was busy looking at Jessica Alba at the same time).

Paul Walker is 6’3’’ and has great physique if you haven’t noticed. Personally I cannot hang out with a dumb guy although he might have a Calvin Klein underwear model body. But, I think I can hang out with Paul Walker. LOL. I proudly admit that Paul Walker is my ultimate eye candy for these days.

Grateful

2006-03-14T22:06:00.000-08:00

All throughout today, it felt like God wanted to talk to me about the issue I’ve been struggling with. After the consulting skills workshop, I wasn’t very happy for a couple of days due to my career path. It seemed so long and far away to be where I wanted to be and thought I started two ladders lower than where I wanted to be.

This morning, I got up with this radio show and they were talking about people’s jobs and how much they make. I realized that there are so many people out there who were seriously underpaid. Besides, on my way on the gym this evening, I was listening to NPR for the first time after a couple of weeks. From NPR, the news caster was talking about Chinese farmers who did not have health insurance. Right after that, she was talking about people who have jobs with very inflexible hours and how difficult it is to manage their lives, especially when they have little kids. Some people were fired since they were not able to come to work for a couple of days due to their children’s sickness.

All day long, I thought about how blessed I am to have this job. When I received the job offer last August, I was very excited and did not care much about the details of the offer. But before too long, I started comparing this and that with someone else’s. When I received this job offer, I knew that it would be my perfect first job since God guided me in this path. I felt so shamed that I have complained with small things for the last couple of days and forgot about the feelings I had last year.

It’s easy to take what you have for granted. I should be more grateful about what I have. I have so many good things that I cannot even start the list. I won’t be able to finish the list until tomorrow morning. On the other hand, what I want to have is handful and it might not be what I ‘need’ anyway.

I feel grateful again since God once again took some time with me and made me realize how much He loves me. Oh, God. When can I become more mature? Thank you for loving me in spite of my childish behavior time to time.

2006-03-13T07:34:00.000-08:00

Jefferson Team - I realized that I tend to be in the middle of the picture for the most times. Ah well. What can I do? I'm the dominant one. ;)

2006-03-13T07:31:00.000-08:00

My team for the first 2 days - Joanne, Me, Darlina, and Tammy

2006-03-13T07:30:00.000-08:00

Team member Eric, and me at the Jefferson conference room where we spent too much time during the workshop

2006-03-12T08:50:00.000-08:00

Travel Buddies: ice tea, pink scarp, and my camera

2006-03-12T08:24:00.000-08:00

Clear sky, outside of Hirshhorn Museum and Sculpture Garden

2006-03-12T08:23:00.000-08:00

Use me

2006-03-12T08:22:00.000-08:00

Hiroshi Sugimoto Exhibition, Smithsonian Hirshhorn Museum and Sculpture Garden

3rd Day at Workshop: Learned about myself

2006-03-08T20:29:00.000-08:00

In this workshop, I have learned a lot about consulting skills. But most importantly, I had chances to learn about myself. Yeah. I confirmed my character - I’m dominant yet sociable. I already mentioned that this workshop reminds me of “Apprentice” in many ways. This morning, we had a surprise. We had worked on a project with team members for the last 2 days and were ready for our client presentation. However, the instructor called one person from each group (there are four groups in this classroom) and switched that person to another group. I was one of four people who were called. So, we had to prepare for last minute group dynamic changes in one hour before the client presentation, which we had worked for 8 hours.

Guess why I was selected? The people who were asked to switch their team were the dominant characters/leaders of the group. Since all of my other team members were quiet and did not want to step up to set the direction, I suggested outlines and where we should go. I guess it was obvious to instructors that I was leading the team.

Instructors were interested in seeing how students would react to the new situation: how students would react to losing their leader and how to adopt a new member. I was able to put my value to the team work right away and the new members were very nice to me. We finished our presentation successfully and the client positively commented on my performance. :D

This workshop was very valuable since it gave me confidence to lead and manage a team and validated that my leadership style works. Quite a few people were surprised to know that I have Ph.D and I’m an entry level consultant. I believe I can prove myself eventually and move up.

Another valuable lesson learned was it takes time to learn processes, skills, and culture. I will work hard on whatever project I will be on although it would be tedious and bored to death. That’s something you have to do along the way. You cannot be a manager right away. You have to build experiences from the lower ends if it’s your first job.

The workshop was also inspiring in many ways. I saw many talented people and wanted to keep up with my skills and knowledge. When I interacted with successful senior managers, I wanted to be like them down the road.

I feel so blessed to have this job, learning opportunities, and work with talented people. I will keep working on my weaknesses and increasing strengths. Sometimes I’m wondering what I’m going to be in 5 years. I didn’t know that I would do what I’m doing now when I came to the States in Fall 2001. It’ll be interesting to find out!

2nd Day at Consulting Skills Workshop

2006-03-07T14:59:00.000-08:00

This 5 day workshop is more than I expected in terms of quality of instruction, intensity of work, and the quality of people. Instead of sitting in a class for 8 hours, we are actually doing a project for 5 days.
There are 12 work groups made of 6 people in each group. Each group has a client you have to deal with. I feel like I'm in the "Apprentice." I work with 5 other entry level consultants for this project and I'm the only Dominant one (I got the maximum score from the behavior style analysis).

I have learned many things while I'm engaging in this workshop/project. I also learned about my strengths and areas of improvement. At the end of the day, all I want is crawling into this giant comfy white bed. But I cannot live without having fun either. I gotta go out and meet my friends. ;)

Full Social Week

2006-03-04T20:10:00.000-08:00

I just had a fullest social week ever since I moved to Atlanta.
I felt very grateful that I made some good friends.

Last Tuesday, I went out with co-workers and had a chance to get to know them. We went to this tapas and wine restaurant and then a lounge for a cocktail. Since we were drinking quite a bit that night, I had to meet a friend and talk for one hour before I was able to drive. No wonder all of them decided to work from home the next day.

Wednesday! Big basketball game night between FSU vs. Duke I watched a game with my friend from a rock gym at a little pub in downtown and was So glad we won!!

I had so much fun on Thursday at a night club. My friend organized a small gathering at this club where they had a free salsa lesson and a belly dance show. We were supposed to leave before midnight and that didn’t happen. Time flew when we had fun. I was happy that I was able to work from home on Fridays.

I went shopping with my friend on Friday and had some pizza and beer over girl talk.

On Saturday, I attended a leadership and communication workshop hosted by NAAAP and met many cool people and alredy organized a next novice climbing event for two other girls. (I think I should work for this rock gym since I brought so many new customer.)

Alright, it wasn't easy to attend social events 5 days in a row but I felt so grateful that I started expanding my social network. :)

I'll be in D.C. for the next week for a training and as soon as I get of the plane on Friday, I will attend a bowling social night.

Working from Home

2006-02-27T12:45:00.000-08:00

A typical "working from home" day. Lounge wear, no make up, and just being comfortable.

Rock Climbing Progress Report

2006-02-26T18:39:00.000-08:00

Now I can climb most of 5.8 routes and some 5.9- ones. Colorful knees are the symbol of my hard work. Who knew I would enjoy climbing this much? I went to the rock gym 3 times last week and learned lead climbing as well. :)

Welcome to my family

2006-02-24T14:57:00.000-08:00

Out of my 40 pairs of shoes, I realized that I did not have basic black pumps. Since I was in Florida, I have so many open toe slip-on shoes, which I cannot wear to work. (a great excuse to buy another pair of shoes) Guess what? Now I have them. Welcome to my family.

NAAAP Power Lunch

2006-02-23T12:43:00.000-08:00

I started enjoying my life in Atlanta as I attend more social events and meet people. Through my friend, I got to know this National Association for Asian American Professionals (NAAAP) organization. I was pleasantly surprised the size and activities of the organization. I attended one of their biggest events last weekend and heard about the Power Lunch. Since it was going to be at the next building of my office, I attended although I didn’t know anyone (Wasn’t I brave, as always?). The lunch was a small but powerful networking opportunity and truly enjoyed getting to know some people. During the lunch, I learned about a leadership workshop and planed to attend it next weekend. It seems like I have more things to put on my social calendar now.

Oh! The main mission of the NAAAP is to build network and positive impression for Asian American professionals across the business industry. When I mentioned this to one of my co-workers, he said “isn’t the impression is smart and hard worker? Why do you guys need to change that?” Well.. I guess that’s a good stereotype. Maybe the new mission of NAAAP should be “We know how to have fun.” That sounds more like my-kind-of organization. ;)

(If you want to know more about the organization, go to http://www.naaap.org/)

Rainy Wednesday

2006-02-22T20:48:00.000-08:00

I’m not a huge fan of rainy days, especially after spending more than four years in the Sunshine State. Although it was raining pretty hard all day long, I had a good day after all. First of all, I had two lunches – one before noon at my desk because I was starving and the other one around 2 with co-workers. I had a chance to eat at the one of the top 10 seafood restaurants in the nation, which happened to be a block away from our office. I got to know some of co-workers we share the space together. Finally I was actually busy at work and made me feel good (For those who hung out long enough with me would understand how excited I was since I finally got busy). After work, I had a chance to eat dinner and drink my favorite Sam Adams seasonal beer with a friend. Yeah.. It was a good rainy day since I was busy all day, had two lunches, and drank Sam Adams. :)
(picture is from http://www.nada.kth.se/~asa/bilder/rainyday.jpg)

Changing Lanes

2006-02-21T13:32:00.000-08:00

Changing lanes

One of the biggest challenges I have experienced ever since I moved in Atlanta was dealing with bad traffic and the complicated road system. For the first couple of days in Atlanta, I had to think through whether going outside of my place is absolutely necessary since driving around was very stressful for me. I may have good memory but do not have great sense of direction, so it takes time to memorize roads and landmarks. Once I figured out the 4 mile range from where I live, I had to commute to this downtown office, which is 18 miles away from my condo. The most stressful thing that I had to deal with at work was getting there. The lanes in Atlanta highway tend to disappear and reappear and drive me crazy. For example, it will be 7 lanes in downtown and becomes 4 and then 5 and then.. .who knows how many lanes it will be? The thing is it’s not easy for me to change lanes when the traffic is so bad.

I studied how to minimize changing lanes on highways. Here’s my routine to go to work. Until I get on the GA 400, I’m just cruising this waviest Peachtree-Dunwoody road for 4 miles. As soon as I get on GA400, I have to move two lanes on left within 1 mile otherwise I will go to the 285 highway. When GA 400 merges to I-85, I have to move one lane to my left and then two more on my right before I get off the exit.

When I go back home, I have to change 3 lanes on my left as soon as I get on the highway in one mile. Otherwise I will go to I-75, instead if I-85. Believe me! It’s quite a challenge if you want to perform this task between 5 and 6 pm in Atlanta. No wonder I’m so tired after work. Sigh.

Although it’s not easy to go to the office, I’m a positive person at the end. Instead of avoiding working at the downtown, (well which was not my option anyway), I decide to make this commute as my learning experience for Atlanta roads and bad traffic situation. I have to admit that I still feel a sharp needle on my spine whenever I had to change lanes on the busy highways. So Guys! Please pray for my safety on the road.

2006-02-20T10:13:00.000-08:00

At the new hire training. 8 people from 6 different countries - Korea, America, India, England, Austrailia, and Lebanon. I was happy to see such a diverse group at the training. So far, it's a fun place to work.

Harvard Law Degree vs. Climbing 5.10

2006-02-20T09:39:00.000-08:00

I notice that I do not get easily impressed on material things or educational background. I went to a single gathering yesterday and one of the guys I talked to kept talking about his Harvard law degree whenever he had a chance. For example, I asked “Where are you from?” and he said “I’m from Louisiana but I went to Harvard law school and spent some time in Boston.” He just went on and on about his law school dorm mates and his plans to retire when he turns 40 and become a professor. He also talked about how lazy he was and that’s why being a professor will be cool – flexible schedule and what not. And he kept going on about his plan to get his Ph.D. So, here I was, a bit annoyed to hear all those stories, telling him “Oh, sounds great! That’s why I already have a Ph.D. I also want to go back to academia when I have a good opportunity after having some experience in the business industry.” I guess after that, the Harvard law school conversation was pretty much ended.

However, I get impressed on some other things – usually artistic and athletic skills and abilities. I would stare at a great climber who climbs a 5.10 wall with admiration. Or I would be amazed to see someone’s artistic skills – from drawings and photography to singing and playing musical instruments. I didn’t really think about what impressed me and, after the last night’s gathering, I realized I’m pretty weird on that perspective as well.

2006-02-19T21:02:00.000-08:00

We went to "Twist" 5 minutes before the kitchen close. Guess what? We used that 5 minutes very well and ate the whole thing - 4 sushi rolls, fried calamari, chocolate tasters, shrimp dumplings, and of course martinis.:)

2006-02-19T20:59:00.000-08:00

Joyce and her sister Beatrix

2006-02-19T20:57:00.000-08:00

Valentine's Day with three other fabulous girls

2006-02-13T19:32:00.000-08:00

Joyce with her Big smile. :)

2006-02-13T19:30:00.000-08:00

Let me introduce my cool climbing partner, Joyce.

2006-02-13T19:29:00.000-08:00

Joyce! On belay?

2006-02-13T19:23:00.001-08:00

Who's accessible to where?

2006-02-13T19:23:00.000-08:00

Gotta have red shoes even for climbing ;)

2006-02-13T19:22:00.000-08:00

Tie the knot before climbing on

2006-02-13T19:20:00.000-08:00

My pretty long nails are getting shorter due to rock climbing. boo

2006-02-10T08:43:00.000-08:00

Great Combo: Haagen-dazs Strawberry Shortcake and my big TV

2006-02-10T08:41:00.000-08:00

I was pretty tired after the first day at the downtown office. Spending 2 hours on the road wasn't fun.

Relax

2006-02-08T21:39:00.000-08:00

Life is too short to worry about little things.